With Mother’s Day just a couple days away, I got to thinking about how my family tends to celebrate special occasions. When the boys were little, I tried to make them special cakes and keep their days somewhat separate although their birthdays were only about 2 weeks or so apart. It’s so much easier to have one get-together or party, right? And I was never a big fan of having a ton of kids over my house because most of them didn’t follow my rules and their parents did very little to discipline them. Scott will recall at least a couple bowling birthday parties! I think I even set a rule that, at age 10, it would be “family-only” get-togethers. I wasn’t a very nice mom! LOL
Holidays aren’t much different. Oh, we do try to get the family all together for Christmas, Easter, and Thanksgiving, but even those don’t always work out because, as a nurse, I often have to work holidays/weekends so can’t be part of some celebrations. For a while, the boys had to juggle being with me and being with their dad. Then we added Lyle and his family into ours, so they were wanted at three different family gatherings. Luckily, we’ve all learned to be flexible, opting for getting together on days that aren’t exactly on the scheduled holiday.
So, have the kids ever felt slighted in any way because we don’t make a huge deal out of every occasion? I hope not. Still, I know that we are pretty low-key when it comes to celebrations. Now that both boys are out on their own, especially Sean being in another state, it’s even harder to get together. Gifts now are sent by mail, maybe just some money stuffed in a card. Seems impersonal, but then, it’s hard to know what to buy anyone anymore. Mom has everything she wants or needs, so she gets flowering plants of some sort, maybe a gift card, perhaps some photos. Is it enough? Sean still asks for specific things, which is nice, since it means he’s getting something he wants/needs, but it’s hard to find something to surprise him with anymore. Scott, well, he always wants stuff for his car, or, lately guns/ammo….expensive things and also harder for me to get for him, so he usually just gets money. Heck, even Lyle and I aren’t big on gift-giving in terms of trying to guess what the other might like but had not actually asked for.
Probably the one thing that I enjoy most is hosting either Thanksgiving or Christmas at my house, where I’m in charge of the meal. I don’t cook much the other 364 days, but that one meal a year, I go all out and, if I do say so myself, I do a damned fine job! It’s a lot of work, but for that one day, I really love to do it. For that one day, I want everyone who comes to my home to feel welcome, happy, wanted, loved…and full! I hope that there is always that one day that I can do this for my family. Would I like it to be more days out of the year? Sure! But it’s hard to get everyone together consistently the rest of the time. I hope the boys have more opportunities to celebrate birthdays and holidays in ways that they find pleasurable, creating memories that they will look back on fondly when they, perhaps have children of their own.